Random Crap.

So, here I am, lying around doing absolutely nothing. Even my Farmville field lies fallow.

My body aches because of the multiple sclerosis (henceforth referred to as The MonSter) and I could really use a bowl of cereal and a cuppa coffee. Seriously, though, I really have no business complaining about the MonSter, because it's not like I'm using a cane or anything. I can walk and talk, I'm just TIRED and ACHEY and bitchy. 'Course, the bitchy has nothing to do with it, that bit is just part of my charm.

I believe after I do those things, I'll show y'all what I've made recently and maybe I'll even take a frickin shower.

HOLY CRAP! I dropped off a beautiful blanket and forgot to get a picture of it!!! Thank goodness for my friend Cristi, she's gonna go visit the blanket's new owner and snap a picture of it for me :)

I am getting a migraine, it hurts to turn my head. Gotta fake feeling good, though, because I'm going to a baseball game tonight. Lovely. How come all the good stuff happens when I feel like shit?

Abridged Handbook on How To Classify Insanity

There are several types of crazy.

The first is bat-shit crazy. This type of person is someone you should NEVER become friends with. You should pretend you are deaf and walk away if one should ever approach you. Bat-shit crazy people will call you twenty times in the middle of the night asking you for money or to tell you about someone who is "after" her and come over crying to you with her latest drama. Bat-shit crazy people are the ones you see on the news, or yelling at cars from the side of the road. They may have started out in life just fine, but something or someone came along and royally screwed them up. Your inner Mother Theresa may beg you to love them, anyway, but stuff a sock in her mouth and throw her back in the closet. People like this are poison and are VERY contagious. Stay. The. Fuck. Away.

The second type of crazy is the good type of crazy. Goofball. When I met my best friend, Danielle, she had just smelled my then two-year-old son's head and looked around the room. "Whose kid is this? He smells good!" She then proceeded to sing into a cooking utensil. There was NO music playing. However, it didn't matter. Right then, I knew I had to be her friend. She had to be my friend. She was AWESOME!

The third type of crazy is the Dumbass. This crazy fool is the one you see getting a nutshot on America's Funnies Home Videos... On PURPOSE.

"Hey, Cletus, watch this!"

"Thud."

"Hahaha! Pull up the truck, we gotta get him stitched up again."

These are the ones who put Coca-Cola into their children's baby bottles and have forty cats.

You should generally avoid a Dumbass, as this can make other people label you as a Dumbass By Association.

***Edited to add:

I forgot to add "Bless Her Heart Crazy." That's the clueless, Golden Girls-era Betty White kind of crazy. Simple minded and 'touched.' This person is dumber than a kickstand on a tricycle. She doesn't mean any harm, she is just plain stupid, bless her heart. Being around her won't harm you, it will actually make you look even smarter and better.

What are other types of crazy?

Sabotage!

Sabotage!

Sorry it's been a while, y'all. I never said I was good at consistency (or being on time, but that ain't none of your business).

At any rate, I hope you've been having a more productive day that I am.

Today at around lunch time, I was told that the black weed-preventing stuff I put down in my garden had blown all over the gosh darned place. There was a big rain and wind storm the night before last and it blew everything all to hell. I had to go pick it up and pick the metal (useless b@stards!) staples out.

I've almost finished with the crazy-colored blanket that G-Man wanted me to crochet for him. I was supposed to have finished it today, but Renee said it should be even bigger so G can wrap himself up in it. So, it'll probably be another week or so until I finish it. I like the idea of it being even bigger, though, because I don't want him to grow out of it. It is already the size of a throw, but I want him to use it when he's a teenager without his feet stickin' out of the other side of it.

In the speeches I give to the high school kids, I speak about sabotage, telling them how easy it is for them to sabotage their futures. One wrong decision can affect their entire lives.

However, there are other forms of sabotage that people do on a daily basis... For example, if I stay up late one night, I have sabotaged the next morning because I'm too doggone tired to do anything. Or, maybe I sabotaged myself by skimping on the staples for the weed-stop fabric.

How do you sabotage yourself?

Rainy Monday

Today is a sick, soggy day. I feel just fine, but I am about to do some old fashioned witch doctorin' on my Kamrin. She has some sort of yuck going on, with a rattly, chesty cough, headache, fever of 101.7, and sleepy.

Whiny, too.

But, hey, aren't we all? When I'm sick, the world has to know every nuance of my aches, every update on my gastric maladies, and every bitch on my mind. When Mama's sick, EVERYONE knows about it.

I've been running ragged this past week. I'm so darn tired of drivin' around, even though I have a sweet, new ride. I did treat myself on Saturday, while I was up in Columbia for a MADD meeting. Columbia has the closest Hobby Lobby, which carries my favorite brand of yarn... it's called, "I Love This Yarn." And I certainly do.

I loaded my cart with yarns, but in this sweet little dishcloth, I used "I Love This Cotton" in Too Pink Print. It is variegated, but just look at the stripes that occurred! Bless their little hearts, those yarn makin' fools, for making miracles like this happen!

I got the pattern from http://bronsfiberstuff.typepad.com/photos/seed_stitch_crochet_dishc/100_1186.html

Well, it is time to wash up and start drivin' around again. Picking up kids, going to the doctor, getting stuff for dinner. Tonight's selection is to doctor up Miss Kamrin. Homemade vegetable soup. Got this from cooks.com:

1 lg. can V-8 juice
1 can stewed tomatoes
1 can carrots
1 can green beans
1 onion, chopped
1 green pepper, chopped
2 beef bouillon cubes
2 c. water
1/2 tsp. garlic powder
2 tsp. chili powder
4 stalks celery, chopped

Add above ingredients in large pan. Bring to boil, reduce heat. Simmer 1 hour or until celery is tender.

I think I'm gonna omit the peppers and onions and substitute other veggies and onion powder, cause I'm picky like that. I'm the Queen, I'm allowed.

I'm going MADD, I tell ya!

Hoooo, lawdy, it's been a long time since I've blogged.

Lots of stuff has happened, y'all. I have started a new MADD chapter here in Charleston, and I'm still in the process of getting it off the ground. I've been on the news a couple times, too. I'm famous, but not for witnessing tornadoes in the trailer park. I want EVERYONE to know what I'm up to (as far as that goes, not for the common whoredom) and I wanna beg for minions... er... volunteers. I am damn near perfect, but I can't do all this myself. Shoot.

Now that I think about it, I betcha if the cops and Waffle House cooperated, we'd round up almost all of the potential drunk drivers every night at about two thirty a.m.

Next week, I have a meet'n with the MADD lady from the state office. She is really cool, for a Yankee, but I ain't gonna fault her for that. She didn't choose to be born way up there.

There will be a couple of other volunteers there, hopefully, that I will be able to meet. It is exciting to see my goes come to fruition, and WOW, what a way to honor my babygirl! I really think that the good Lord has put me on the path I need to be on. He's given me the gift of gab, that's for sure, and that comes in very handy nowadays. I just wish I hadn't lost it for the past nine years...

Holy crap, NINE years. Bless my poor soul, can you even believe it's been that long??? Happy anniversary, thanks for the memories...