Sunday, January 6, 2008

The Epiphany of The Bad Gifter

I feel like ass.

I'm going to the doctor, as I am not sure exactly what is wrong with me.

So, feel sorry for me and give me loves.

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And now, The Epiphany of The Bad Gifter.

I am the worst gifter in the world.
The massaging car seat cover? I bought that for you.
The ashtray that says "No Smoking." Yeah, that was me.

If I draw your name on Christmas, or if I am showing up for your birthday party, please learn the polite, "Wow, how nice" and the fake smile. You'll need it.

present

I never have a good idea what to get people. Frantically, I walk up and down the aisles of a department store and grasp for anything I can find. Costume jewelry? Fuzzy socks? Mysterious gadget?

Time Machine
Sure, but where do the batteries go?

So, I end up leaving with a gift I know you wouldn't like. I wrap it with my head hanging in shame. I know you won't like it, but it is all I have to offer.

BUT...

Last week (conveniently the week after Christmas, go figure), though, I had an epiphany.
OMG

The key to buying a good present is to PRETEND YOU ARE THE GIFTEE. (is that a word?) If you put yourself in the gift recipient's shoes and picture what they would actually want... you are more likely to get that person a GOOD GIFT.

No more Chia Pets.
No more giant remote controls.
No more joke presents.
Fart Machine
If I have any doubt in my mind after this, you're getting a gift card.





6 comments:

'All Or Nothing' Anjie said...

Bad gifters unite!! I love your thought on how to give a good gift. However, I'll probably be sticking with gift cards ;) .

'All Or Nothing' Anjie said...

I forgot the big hugs & the 'poor baby' . I really hope you feel better :( .

Tina Puntigam said...

I'm playing my violin for you. It sounds all sad and melancholy because you don't feel well.

Christina

Quinn said...

Awww honey I hope you feel better soon! I am a good gifter... I think LOL

Emily Brown said...

I always try to buy gifts that I would like :p
I had to buy an exchange gift for A to take to his daycare & I bought one of those big balls with a handle you can bounce on bc I have always wanted one!:p

Hope your feeling better.

Veloute said...

Lovies and hugs :)